Confessions
By Oshun Anat

 
You know Iphicles, I have to say that I'm sorry that I had to have you killed.

I mean, really, you were an excellent fuck and I did care about you. I can't say whether or not it was love, you betrayed me too soon for me to really figure it out.

No matter what you may have thought, or whatever nonsense your idiot brother filled your head with, you were smart, compassionate, and most of all, you were a great submissive. I think that you were born to be submissive.

If you can hear me now, just imagine yourself face down on my bed, royal purple silk scarves tying you spread-eagle to my bed, a pillow beneath your hips to bring your ass up higher. I've placed another scarf around your eyes so you couldn't see what I was doing, to help you focus on the sensations. I have had you here for hours now, taking my time with you. Smacking you on your ass, pinching your thigh, tracing a down feather over your feet. You are squirming now, your cock hard and leaking. You'd be begging me if it weren't for the gag I had placed in your mouth because I didn't want to be distracted. Maybe if you were lucky I'd fuck you soon. If not, I might leave you here and go get sucked off by one of my servant boys so I could wait even longer before I'd shove my cock into you. Finally, I would give you what you want, and you'd scream my name as you come just from the sensation from me being inside of you.

It's a shame you're dead. I would have enjoyed acting this out. It's not like you would have given me the chance to, would you? You'd rather have done this with Mars, the blasted War God who only shows up when ever he's horny and leaves after he's satiated. I still don't believe he really cared about you, I'm sure he was just using you. You did know that he always makes the circuit of loyal rulers, didn't you? I wouldn't have been surprised if he forgot to mention it....

No matter, Iphicles. Had we never become lovers, I would still have dominated in battle. Poor little wannabe king. You were never meant to rule, and you know it. You were much happier serving as the "great" Corinthian General, where you were at least respected (so you thought) by your troops, riding at the front lines, gallantly protecting Corinth from all comers. You were just lucky that we never met on the plains of war. I would have routed your men in no time at all. My men would have followed me into the depths of Tartarus to fight for Rome. Would your men have done that for you? Even your precious War God wouldn't have been able to save you; your strategy too well known, your men not as well trained or as well armed. Quite simply put, Corinth would have been mine, and I would have made you my slave. I would have taken great pride in breaking you until you would never even think of looking at anyone else besides me. But that is an alternate reality that we will never know. Maybe that should have been our reality. You would never have left me for that prick Mars, just because he dropped his pants and said, "I have the biggest cock on Olympus, suck me."

I bet you were surprised when the assassin dug his knife into your heart that night. You thought that everyone was well and good in the kingdom of Corinth, didn't you? Your neighbors too busy fighting each other to pay attention to you, your economy prosperous and your townspeople happy. I bet you even thought I was blissfully unaware of your affair with Mars.  I can see your thought process now: you're in Greece, I'm in Rome. Your advisor in charge of intelligence is a man of respectable intelligence and had already ferreted out several of my spies. That combined with the fact that your diplomats would probably never pass on such rumors because they wouldn't want to anger me made you figure that there was no way such rumors could ever reach me.

As I'm sure you have figured out by now, I did find out. I found out from my spies in the palace that hadn't been discovered yet. I found out from the diplomats who let the information slip, with a bottle of good Roman wine and a discreet inquiry about Your Majesty's love life. How were they to know that we had been together?  Thanks to my servants not being foolish enough to gossip about my sex life, the only ones who knew about us were the maids who cleaned our rooms, but I digress.

I can't begin to tell you how infuriated I was at the news, so I'm not even going to try. You betrayed my trust, Iphicles. For the first time in my life, I trusted someone enough that I actually believed that they would keep their promise to me. I actually believed that you wouldn't have a long term affair with another man, let alone a god. I wasn't foolish enough to believe that you wouldn't fuck anyone; you were a strong, virile man, of course you'd need release. I just didn't expect things to turn out this way.

When I found out that you were sleeping with Mars, I must admit that I wasn't too surprised, after all, I've slept with him, so he has good taste. Still, your betrayal burned inside of me. No one betrays Julius Caesar without suffering the consequences.

For weeks I agonized over what would be suitable. I considered destroying shrines to Mars, but not only would that bring bad luck to Rome, it also wasn't his fault you're so easy to seduce. I considered launching an attack against Corinth. Despite the diplomats' warnings about attacking Corinth, my real misgivings were that I needed the troops back in Alysia. The Celts were starting to get cocky again. That left me with the option of doing something more personal, which suited me better. You betrayed me, so you should be the only one to clear your debt.

I had to find something of value to take away from you. You had no wife, so that was out of the question. Going further along those lines, you are[also without heirs. You do not like your brother enough, plus I have no desire to get into trouble with Jove over killing his favorite child. I toyed with killing your mother, and Jason, although they wouldn't offer nearly the same satisfaction. So that left you. It makes sense really; those who oppose me, try to stop me or defy me all end up dead sooner or later. It's only the circumstances that vary. Once I decided it had to be you, the rest was simple. Some gold changed hands, and soon enough you were meeting Pluto.

I think now that perhaps I was a bit hasty. Maybe I shouldn't have killed you. I'm sure I could have found something that would have appeased my anger. Maybe I should have just tried talking to you, but then I'm not very good when it comes to this emotional stuff... You attacked me, and I responded the only way I knew how. Now I must pay for the consequences. It's funny, I've never really felt guilt or remorse about killing anyone. Anyone who interfered with my destiny had to be removed. It was as simple as that. But you...you didn't really interfere. You were tempted and you succumbed to that temptation. He's a god! I would have taken will-power and amazing bravery to be able to have said no.  For your sake, Iphicles, I hope you ended up in your Elysia. You didn't deserve Tartarus.

You know, this didn't have to happen. You could have said no. You could have said no the second, or third time Mars came to you. You could have written to me and told me what was going on. I would have still been mad, but maybe I wouldn't have gone this far. Maybe you would still be alive.

Maybe I would have been able to admit that I loved you.

I love you, Iphicles.

 End